Adoption records: how an adopted daughter found her birth mother

By Hannah OvertonPublished 28 October 20268 mins read11 sections

A woman held her newborn son and realised she could not answer the midwife’s questions about her own family’s health. She had been adopted as a baby. Our family law specialists advised her on getting her adoption records and finding her birth mother safely. This is an anonymised account.

A question she could not answer

She had always known she was adopted. Her adoptive parents had told her early and kindly. For years she needed nothing more.

Then her own child arrived. She wanted to know whose face her son might grow into. She also wanted the medical history she had never had.

Yet she was frightened on two fronts. She feared hurting the mother who raised her. And she feared that her birth mother might not want to be found. She did not know where the paperwork was, or whether she had a right to see it.

If that sounds like you, those feelings are normal. Wanting to know where you began is not disloyal to anyone.

What the law says about adoption records

The rules depend on when the adoption took place. For adoptions made on or after 30 December 2005, section 60 of the Adoption and Children Act 2002 gives an adopted adult the right, on request, to receive from the adoption agency the information needed to get a copy of their birth record.

Our client was adopted well before that date. For her, section 79(6) applies Schedule 2 of the same Act instead. Under paragraph 1, an adopted person aged 18 or over can apply to the Registrar General for that information. Paragraph 2 says the Registrar General must first tell the applicant that counselling is available. Counselling is compulsory only for people adopted before 12 November 1975, under paragraph 4.

Next, section 98 deals with what the Act calls pre-commencement adoptions. It allows regulations that help adopted adults obtain information and make contact with birth relatives. In England, those regulations are the Adoption Information and Intermediary Services (Pre-Commencement Adoptions) Regulations 2005. Under regulation 7, an intermediary agency must not give the applicant identifying information about the person they are looking for without that person’s consent.

Finally, section 80 requires the Registrar General to keep the Adoption Contact Register. Adopted adults can join one part, and birth relatives can join the other. GOV.UK sets the fee at £15 for an adopted person and £30 for a relative. The register is not a tracing service. It only links people who have both chosen to join.

How we guided her search through her adoption records

First, we helped her plan the order of steps, so nothing reached her birth mother before she was ready.

We advised her to join the Adoption Contact Register straight away. It costs little, and a birth relative might already be waiting there. Meanwhile, she applied to the General Register Office on the Birth certificate Information Before Adoption (BIBA) form, with our guidance.

She was adopted after 1975, so counselling was optional. We still suggested it. A counsellor would help her prepare for whatever the birth record showed. She agreed, and later called it the best hour of the process.

Next, we explained why an intermediary agency made sense. A trained worker would make the first approach, and nobody would arrive unannounced on a doorstep. We helped her choose a registered adoption support agency, which could contact the original adoption agency about her adoption records, and she applied to it herself.

We also helped her write a short letter the agency could pass on. It was warm and asked for nothing. It said who she was and that any reply would be welcome.

Finally, we talked about her adoptive mother. She chose to tell her before the search began. Her mother cried, then offered to help.

The outcome

The register showed no match at first. However, the birth certificate gave her birth mother’s name at the time of the adoption. With that, the intermediary agency found her.

The agency then asked the birth mother, privately, whether she wanted contact. She took a few weeks to think. Then she said yes.

They exchanged letters for some months before meeting. Her birth mother shared the family health history our client had needed. They now speak regularly, at a pace that suits them both.

Every family is different, and not every search ends in contact. This account is not a promise about any other case.

What you can take from this

Before you ask for adoption records, check your adoption date. It decides which law applies and where you apply.

Join the Adoption Contact Register early. It is cheap, and it only works for people who have joined.

Take the counselling, even when it is optional. Your birth record may hold surprises.

Use an intermediary agency for the first approach. It protects you and the person you are looking for. If contact after adoption is your wider concern, our guide to post adoption contact explains the options. You can also read how we prepare these success stories.

“Before you start, decide what you would do with each possible answer, including silence. A birth parent may have a partner or children who have never heard about the adoption, so let a trained intermediary make the first approach. For adoptions before 30 December 2005, the agency must not share details identifying a living birth parent without their consent, and has to take reasonable steps so they know enough to decide. Let letters come before any meeting.”

Hannah Overton, Complex Children Specialist, Kabir Family Law

Talk it through with us

If you are thinking about your own adoption records, you do not have to start alone. A free initial consultation is confidential and carries no obligation. Tell us your story, and our family law specialists will explain the steps in the right order for you.