Living Apart Together: Where You Stand If the Relationship Ends

By Garry SteedmanPublished 24 September 2026Last reviewed 24 September 202612 mins read11 sections

Part of: Family Law Specialists

If you are living apart together, you may feel as committed as any married couple. The law in England and Wales does not see it that way. Two homes give you no special legal status, so if you split up or one of you dies, the law asks whether you married, whose name is on each home and who paid for what. The government itself calls the law’s protections for cohabiting couples “very limited” (Ministry of Justice), and couples with two homes can have fewer still. Our cohabitation agreement specialists assist and advise couples who want to know where they stand.

You might have been in a living apart together relationship for ten years and still have two front doors. This guide shows what the law does for you, and where couples often go wrong. It covers England and Wales only.

Reviewed by: Iblal Iqbal, Partner & Family Law Strategist, Kabir Family Law

What does living apart together mean?

Living apart together, often shortened to LAT, describes a committed couple who choose to keep separate homes. Some are dating later in life and already own a home. Others have children from an earlier relationship. Some couples have married, but work or caring keeps them in different places.

LAT relationships are a lifestyle choice, not a legal category. They are common among older couples living apart together, who may each have a home, savings and grown-up children. However, the law ignores the label. For anyone living apart in a relationship, the questions stay the same: did you marry, who owns what, and who paid for it?

That gap catches people out. Many couples assume that years together slowly build up rights. They do not, and finding out after a split or a death is far harder than planning now.

Do couples who live apart together have legal rights?

Unmarried couples have very few. England and Wales has no legal status of “common law marriage”, however long you have been together and even if you have children. Our guide to the common law marriage myth explains why.

Marriage changes the picture, wherever each of you sleeps.

The government consulted from June to August 2026 on new protections for cohabiting couples. Its proposals would cover adults who have lived together for at least three years, or who live together and share a child (consultation document). So a couple with two homes may not qualify, even if the plans become law. Nothing has changed yet; our summary of what the proposals could mean for families explains more.

Living apart together and your home: what happens if you split?

Usually, each of you keeps the home in your own name. The trouble starts when money crosses over. For example, you paid towards your partner’s mortgage or a new kitchen, or you plan to buy together.

When a living apart relationship ends, trust law, not divorce law, settles a dispute over a home. Either of you can ask a court to decide who owns what (TOLATA 1996, s.14). If a home is in one name only, the court starts from the view that its owner owns all of it. So the other partner must prove a share, usually through money they paid in or a shared understanding about ownership.

The court’s powers here are narrow. It cannot award you maintenance, divide pensions or order a lump sum. Our guide to property claims between unmarried partners explains how these cases work.

If you handed over money with nothing in writing, proving what you both intended can be hard. Memories differ, and a bank statement rarely shows why you made a payment.

Does the law treat married couples who live apart together differently?

Yes. Couples who stay married but live apart keep the full legal weight of their marriage. Even when husband and wife live separately for years, each can still make financial claims if the marriage ends. The court then weighs factors such as each person’s resources, the length of the marriage and their contributions, including caring for the family (MCA 1973, s.25).

Living apart does not end a marriage, however long it lasts. Only a court order or a death does that (MCA 1973, s.1). Since 6 April 2022, you no longer need to live apart for a set time before applying for a divorce (SI 2022/283, reg. 2).

Tax can differ too: for a married couple, only one home per couple counts as your main home for any period (GOV.UK). A tax adviser can explain that side.

Married couples living apart together often assume that separate finances keep them safe. They may not. Assets in one name can still count on divorce.

What happens with children when you live apart but stay together?

The birth mother automatically has parental responsibility. An unmarried father can get it by registering the birth jointly with her, or later by agreement or court order (GOV.UK; Children Act 1989, s.4). So if you live apart together with children, check which applies to you before anything changes.

Money for children sits apart from money between adults. Both parents are responsible for the costs of raising their children (GOV.UK, child maintenance). After a split, you can arrange child maintenance between you or through the Child Maintenance Service. Sometimes a parent can also ask the court for a lump sum or a home for the child’s benefit under Schedule 1 to the Children Act 1989 (legislation).

Those orders are for the child, not for you. If you gave up work to raise your child, these rules still give you no claim in your own right, however long you were together.

What happens if your partner dies while you are living apart together?

This is where the gap can hurt most. If your partner dies without a will, the intestacy rules decide who inherits. They put a husband, wife or civil partner first, then children. An unmarried partner does not appear on the list at all.

You could ask the court for reasonable financial provision from the estate. However, the route for partners needs you to have lived in the same household, as if you were husband and wife or civil partners, for the whole two years before the death (Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act 1975, s.1(1A)). With separate homes, you may not fit that route. The other route means showing your partner was maintaining you, through a substantial contribution to your reasonable needs. Either way, you face a court claim against your partner’s estate, often while grieving.

A will can change this, but it needs care. GOV.UK suggests advice on a will if you share a property with someone who is not your husband, wife or civil partner (Making a will). It also warns that a later marriage cancels any will you made before (Update your will).

If you have already put money into your partner’s home, or you are about to, book a free initial consultation. One of our specialists will give you initial advice on where you would stand.

What can you put in place while you live apart together?

You cannot give yourselves the status of a married couple without marrying. However, you can make your intentions far clearer, as long as each step fits the others.

None of these is a form to fill in and forget. Agreements between partners do not bind you automatically, and their drafting affects whether a court will enforce them (Ministry of Justice). How you own a shared home also decides what happens if one of you dies (GOV.UK, joint property ownership).

Living apart together checklist: where would you stand?

Tick what is already true for you.

Frequently asked questions

Expert Tip

We often speak to people who kept everything separate except the money. One partner paid towards a deposit, a kitchen or years of mortgage on a home in the other’s name. Without clear evidence of what you both intended, that money can be very hard to recover once the relationship ends. If you are putting money into a home you do not own, get advice before you pay, not after.

Garry Steedman, Family Law Consultant (Divorce, Children & TOLATA)